How Dancing Made Me Lose Friends — Kaffy Opens Up

Kafayat Shafau, the famous Nigerian dancer and choreographer, who is also known as Kaffy, has said that she lost friends by virtue of being a dancer.

Speaking in an interview with Saturday Beats, she said, “Taking on a career without any gender focus is already tough. As a dancer, the only place we were appreciated was when we were displaying for the National Troupe, or when were called by a governor for a national assignment.

Dancing was not a mainstream career, neither was it commercially viable. Breaking into that door that did not exist was the main sacrifice for me, as well as the pain of losing family friends and people around me. I was practically isolated.

“There even some people who initially supported me, but withdraw their support because they did not see what I was seeing.”

She also stated that women in the entertainment were often viewed as sexual objects.

She said, “As a woman, one is often asked what value one brings to the table to be considered with one’s male peers. I struggled a lot with that, because while expressing myself, I had to deal with music directors, editors and different stakeholders who felt one’s opinion was not necessary.

“But, one of the things that helped me was the fact that I am highly educated and intellectual enough to express my ideas and implement them in ways that earned me respect. I was also hands on with whatever I said.”

The award-wining dancer also noted that in the course of her career, she got more support from men than women.

She said, “I have got more admiration and support from men, than women. It came after a bit of resistance, which is normal, because there will always be some of resistance when one newly gets into a field.”